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Lie #4: Singleness = Loneliness

Scripture: Genesis 2:18 | 1 Corinthians 7:32-35

I. Singleness is hard, but you can be content.

A. Genesis 2:18 does not teach that unless I am married, I am bound to be lonely. All that Genesis 2:18 teaches is that Adam had a big job (he was to have dominion over all the earth according to Genesis 1:28), and God gave him a helper for that job. Eve was called Adam’s helper, not his companion. God’s purpose then for marriage was not to end loneliness. His purpose was for Adam and Eve to help each other rule over the earth for God’s glory.

B. The single life can be hard (see 1 Corinthians 7:9). But singleness does not necessarily mean loneliness. That is a lie. You can learn to be content with a single status. Philippians 4:11: “Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content.” Contentment is demanded of all Christians, not just single Christians. All of us need to be content with what God gives us. We can be content as singles and still pray for a spouse.

II. Singleness tells people Jesus is enough.

A. A single Christian who is content in the world preaches something loud and clear. Jesus is enough for me. Jesus is sufficient for my needs and my desires. A single person’s heart is set on pleasing Jesus (1 Corinthians 7:32). Pleasing Jesus is enough for him or her. But the married person’s heart is in some sense divided (vs. 34). They need to think both about Jesus and their spouse. Did Jesus live a satisfying and fulfilling life on earth? Yes. Was Jesus married? No. It is possible then to live a satisfying life as a single with Jesus.

B. Singleness is a gift (1 Corinthians 7:7). It is not a gift only for those who want to be single. Your circumstances are God’s gracious gift to you. We need to learn to accept those gifts of providence from His good hand as our wise and loving king. When singleness is hard, we can remember the words Jesus spoke to the Apostle Paul in
2 Corinthians 12:9: “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

III. Singles are part of the ultimate family already.

A. Notice the language of love that Paul speaks to singles in 1 Corinthians 7. In vs. 32 he writes about how “the unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord.” The same is said of single women in vs. 34. It’s almost like Paul is saying that the unmarried person has a spouse also that he or she loves. And that spouse is the Lord Jesus. That is, in fact, what Paul is saying. We are all to live in “undivided devotion to the Lord” (vs. 35).

Application:
You don’t have to get married to be free of loneliness.

Sources:
The Bible
“Married for God” by Christopher Ash, “Pure” by Dean Inserra, “Marriage and the Mystery of the Gospel” by Ray Ortlund.

Sermon Discussion Questions

1) How can the single life be hard for people in our church and community? How do churches sometimes treat single people? What makes it possible for any Christian to be content with their circumstances?

2) How have you found Jesus to be enough for you in difficult circumstances? What does it mean to have a gift from God of singleness? What does it not mean?

3) How many people in the church are married to Christ right now? And how many people in heaven will be unmarried to a human spouse?