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Sex & Marriage

July 21, 2019

Scripture: Ephesians 5:31-32

I. Sex is not about certain things.

A. In Ephesians 5:31 Paul quotes from Genesis 2:24 and writes, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” In the very first marriage, God made it clear that marriage comes first and then sex comes after marriage. What are some of the implications of this teaching? One implication is that sex is not just an appetite. See 1Corinthians 6:13. The Corinthians thought that all bodily appetites were pretty much the same. But Paul said that having sex outside of marriage is sexual immorality.

B. A second implication of the Bible’s teaching on sex and marriage is that sex is not dirty. After God had brought the man and woman together in marriage, look at what God says about sex and marriage in Genesis 1:31: “And God saw everything that he had made, and behold it was very good.” Within marriage, sex is a very good gift of God. And if you want confirmation of this fact, read the book of Song of Solomon. God is the creator and giver of sex. So, sex is not dirty. It is in fact good, clean fun – it is holy – within the context of marriage.

C. A third implication of the Bible’s teaching on sex and marriage is that sex is not just about a couple’s happiness and fulfillment. What does Paul say sex and marriage are all about in Ephesians 5:32? “This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.” The covenant of marriage and sex between a husband and wife are simply a picture. They are a picture of Christ’s covenant love for and unity with His church. But if we sin against God’s standards regarding sex and marriage there is forgiveness available. 1 John 1:9: “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”

II. Sex is about certain things.

A. The Bible teaches first of all that sex is about unity. See 1Corinthians 6:15-16. While it is true that becoming one flesh means sexual union, it is clear that becoming one flesh means much more than that to Paul. It means complete unity. To be one flesh is to be united not just physically but also emotionally, personally, socially, economically and legally. For this reason, sex outside of marriage is a lie. When you join your body to another, your body is saying that you are now committed to being one with this other person in every way possible. But if you are not married when you join your body to another, you are withholding your commitment to be truly united.

B. Sex is about renewing a covenant. In Ephesians 5 Paul compares the covenant that a husband makes with his wife in marriage to the covenant that Jesus makes with His church. Every time that husbands and wives come together in sex, they are renewing the covenant that they made on their wedding day. They are saying to each other, “I am still giving myself completely, unreservedly, exclusively to you.” Since it is sex that renews your covenant to one another, sex is far too important to neglect within marriage. See 1Corinthians 7:3-5.

Application:
Remember that sex is about unity and the renewal of the marriage covenant.

Sources:
The letter to the Ephesians
Commentary on Ephesians by Peter O’Brien and 1 Corinthians by Gordon Fee
“The Meaning of Marriage” by Timothy Keller
“If You Only Knew” by Jamie Ivey